Loading the dice
by cein
Summary: Tony is prepping for an undercover mission, and having some fun along the way.


Title:Loading the dice

Character(s):/Tony, McGee, Abby, Gibbs

genre(s):Gen

Episode(s):set during S6, but no specific spoilers

Tony smiled as he raised the dice to his lips and blew gently on them, "Papa needs a new pair of shoes!" he announced to the room as he flung the dice along the table.

At the far end of the makeshift craps table, McGee ducked quickly as the dice came flying straight towards him. "Tony!" he yelped as they flew over his head.

"Foul throw," said Abby, shaking her head in disappointment. "Tony, you're trying too hard. You're supposed to keep the dice *on* the table. McGee, get the dice and let him try again."

"I should be wearing safety goggles," grumbled McGee under his breath. Out loud he said, "Abby, did you see where they went?"

"Maybe you should have kept your eyes open, McScaredy Cat," said Tony, "Then you'd have noticed where they went."

"Maybe *you* should stop aiming for my head," snapped McGee. "That's the third time you nearly hit me."

"Well it's certainly a big enough target. You're just jealous that I get to go undercover instead of you."

"Tony, dressing up like James Bond is *your* fantasy, not mine." McGee crouched down on the floor and peered under the machines lined up against the lab wall.

"That's true," said Abby, "McGee's fantasies were more Star Wars themed."

"Oooh, he ever get you to dress up like Princess Leia?" Tony winked at Abby. "Cause that metal bikini would...ouch, hi Boss! Abby was just giving me a few last minute pointers."

"Really, *Han*," said Gibbs. "Because from here it looked like you were goofing off. McGee, get out from under that machine."

"Just getting the dice back, Boss," said McGee, his voice muffled by the bulk of the mass spectrometer. "Almost got it..." His hands closed over the small cubes and he scrambled back to his feet before rolling them expertly across the table. "See Tony, it's easy."

"I can do it," said Tony, snatching the dice up almost before they'd stopped moving. "I still don't see why it has to be craps. Why can't I make a big splash at the poker table instead?" He jiggled the dice in his hand as he spoke.

"Because you're even worse at playing poker than you are at shooting craps," said McGee.

"Yeah," said Abby. "The last time you played strip poker, you said you ended up in just your shorts."

"Ah," said Tony with a grin, "But you didn't see the ladies I was playing with. Trust me, it was a very strategic loss." He sent the dice bouncing across the table where they were caught by Gibbs. "Nice one, Boss, maybe you should be the one going undercover!"

"Oooh, and you'd look so good in a tuxedo!" said Abby. "Maybe a blue bow-tie to match your eyes..."

"A vodka martini in one hand, a pretty girl on your arm," said Tony. "Too bad Ziva's on vacation in Israel, but maybe we could put McGee in a cocktail dress and *lots* of make up!" He grinned at the double set of glares from the other end of the table. "Or maybe we could stick with the original plan of setting me up as a high roller at the craps table."

"Ya think?"

"Seriously, Gibbs," said Tony, his tone and face reflecting a switch to 'Special Agent DiNozzo' from 'Tony the goofball'. "Not that I mind going undercover like this, but it is a bit of a long shot."

"It may be a long shot, but it's the best lead we've got," said Gibbs, thumbing the dice in his hand. "We'll only get one chance, so make sure you attract plenty of attention."

"That shouldn't be a problem," said McGee under his breath.

"Ah well, it's always nice to know when I've got a target painted on my back," said Tony.

"Doesn't matter how big the target is, nobody's gonna tap it on my watch," said Gibbs. "You're just there to draw them out." Checking the time, he added, "We've got two hours before we need to get you wired up and in position. See if you can figure out how to keep the dice on the table in that time."

"It's harder than it looks, Boss," said Tony. "Maybe I just don't know my own strength...I'll keep practicing."

"You do that DiNozzo," said Gibbs as he made his way to the door. Almost as an afterthought, the dice were tossed over his shoulder, landing on Abby's makeshift craps table and bouncing gently before landing in a natural seven.

Abby, McGee and Tony stared at the dice for a few seconds before Tony broke the silence. "Think two hours is enough to convince Gibbs he should be the one in the tuxedo?"

"Two days wouldn't be long enough," said McGee, his eyes retracing the trajectory the dice had taken.

"Pity, we could have really cleaned up," said Tony as he picked up the dice. "Okay, let's try this again. Fire in the hole!" Winking at Abby, he threw the dice and watched as they bounced off the table and hit McGee in the back of the head. "Hey, whadya know, I think I'm finally getting the hang of these things!"


End file.
